Paraprosdokian, two phrases, the second changing the meaning of the first, usually in a funny or humorous way. The Paradoke Corner top ten in the “Pollyanna’s” category:
10) My gal was faithful to the end. Unfortunately, I was the quarterback.
9) “A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on.” Sam Goldwyn
8) We don’t serve women at this bar. You have to bring your own.
7) “When I told my gentile girlfriend I was bringing the bagels, she set two extra places.” George Furth
6) “There are still things you can get for a dollar – like nickels, dimes and quarters.” - Charles Lindner
5) “That restaurant was so crowded, nobody ever goes there anymore.” Yogi Berra
4) “I ran and ran and ran from the murderers ‘till Mom shook me awake.”
3) "I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'" - Emo Philips
2) “A bum said to me, ‘I haven’t eaten in three days.’ I said, ‘Force yourself.’” - Henny Youngman
And the Paradoke Corner Winner in the “Pollyanna’s” Category:
1) “I wouldn’t hurt a fly – unless it was open.” - Mae West
Next up in the Paradoke Corner:
The “‘CYA’ Top Ten” category goes way back. (Go!)
Or, check out Sandtrap, Jawja’s latest. (Go!)
Compiled from various sources. Paradoke Corner ranking by Phil Comer. Photo by Phil Comer, model Patsy Fried. Unless stated otherwise, links are for information and not the property of the author.